Brenda is a full-time realtor, a successful and therefore busy one, and one who’s schedule is “on demand” for her clients.  When she moved to a new area about five years ago, she found that her old friends were too far away now for weekly socializing, that her new neighbors were at different points in their lives (full-time employees, with families, and a bit younger than her), and that while there were lots of great folks at work, “work” was still the main topic of their conversations (not exactly the reprieve for which she was hoping).

“I use the internet for everything,” Brenda said, “and while not a fan of typical social networking sites like Facebook, I did a Google search using words like “social networking” and “women” and found SocialJane.com. I was delighted and wanted to try it out.”

Her goal in joining SocialJane.com, “to find similarly motivated people, women who are “doers” and proactive in finding new friends,” Brenda said. She says that’s what impressed her about the site, “that there were others, who for a ton of different reasons, were open to new friendships.”

Brenda describes herself as a having a quiet nature, although not necessarily shy, as being practical and real, and drawn to people with good hearts. And when you read Brenda’s profile, those characteristics really shine through. “I just did it quickly and truthfully,” Brenda says about creating her SocialJane.com profile.  “I noted that I was a grandmother, happily married, and that I thought of “friends” as a “gift you give yourself.” I looked for those who lived closest to me (within 25 miles or half an hour drive), and I looked for people who had similar interests.

“I am a good listener, a “survivor” of life as most are at age 60 and older, and therefore able to relate to many people.  I think that women seeking new friends may be outwardly looking for “a tennis partner” for example, but inwardly they are looking for something quite different … someone who genuinely likes them and likes to spend time with them … that is pretty basic stuff, I think! And, I think that my success with SocialJane.com has a lot to do with a genuine desire to “be a friend” as well as “have a friend,” to be vulnerable and most importantly, to reach out and say (as a child so easily does) …”want to be friends?”

Brenda’s initial emails to other members followed a simple formula: she introduced herself (Hi, I saw you on SocialJane.com …), provided a bit of background (I’m a grandmother, happily married, a realtor …), commented on a common interest she shared with the recipient (sounds like we have a few things in common …)., all followed by an invitation to coffee or lunch.

And after meeting with a few of the gals she had contacted, Brenda did a very nice thing, she shared the wealth and invited everyone she had met to dinner so everyone could meet. “That was fun,” Brenda says, “and I still see each one, and now some of them also see each other from time to time.” In fact, a couple of the women have even been on a short trip together!

When asked for any advice that she might provide to other women looking for similar luck on SocialJane.com, Brenda offers this, “Ask yourself what you are really looking for.  If you really want someone to talk to and walk with regularly, don’t look for someone who wants a “travel buddy” twice a year.  If you really love dining out and art movies, don’t look for someone whose main interest are working out and fitness.  Reach out, and be positive.  Don’t complain, gossip, or whine.  That is a downer and hopefully, in time, your new friends won’t care, but in the beginning, everyone is looking for an enriching experience.”

Sounds like some pretty sage advice from one who has been quite lucky professionally and socially. Thanks Brenda, for a great interview and for joining us on SocialJane.com.

Brenda is Bliss on SocialJane.com. Check out her profile here.